Corn Your Marks

Corn Your Marks

Simples

Parlour quoits. Baggo. Sacks. Dadhole. Ramps. Ball bags. The game of Corn Hole is known by many names, but very little else about it has changed since its creator Heyliger de Windt first tossed a beanbag into a hole in 1883 and found it to be fun. Slightly inebriated people have been tossing bags into holes with gay abandon ever since, with the rules virtually unchanged since the 19th century.

Many variations of the game exist – Faba Baga, for example, displays many of the features of modern Corn Hole, but with a square hole rather than a round one. In the Chicago area, a similar game has the unique twist of a round hole, but square bags. It is also not dissimilar to horseshoes, where said equine footwear is tossed on to spikes, but the pointy metal stick element of horseshoes has presumably been deemed inappropriate for the levels of intoxication expected among our competitors tonight.

In short: players armed with beanbags stand approximately 30 feet away from a ramp with a hole in it, and toss the one into the other. Corn Hole TD Phil Baker seemed a bit sketchy about the precise structure of tonight’s event 15 minutes prior to kickoff, but we believe that players will be asked to register in teams of two; each team will be given four shots at the hole and points will be awarded in such a manner that we’ll lose half the field in each round, and we will repeat this until only one team remains. There may or may not be some sort of prize at the end.

Registration is open now in the Players’ Lounge; please ask to speak to Hole-meister Phil to secure your entry. As it were. The event is just about to begin; please stand by for toss-by-toss updates…